I suck at this...

I'm not gonna change. Procrastination might as well be my middle name. Also, I will forever blame procrastination for my inability to document my own life into a blog. I had a livejournal in middle school and high school... continued it sporadically over the first couple years of college.  I stopped. It got to the point where I wondered if I was writing more for myself or more for other people. It was stressful catering to everyone else! This thing, this blogger, is definitely meant for others. Originally I made it to document my year abroad, but I'll be honest in saying that my photo-documentation will suffice for my personal nostalgia later. As for everyone else - I had and have too much going on to write the kind of entries I wish I could write. In my mind the pressure to be witty, insightful, or thorough is too much to bear. Haha. OH THE AGONY! Just talk to me, facebook me, I don't know. Figure it out. 

Less than 3 months left here in Spain. Thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach. I'm looking forward to certain things about next year, but at the same time, I hate goodbyes... and while change is good, I worry that it won't be change. It will be like stepping backwards. I don't want to go back to the life I had before Spain. I'm returning to SB. I'll have to get a job. I'll have a lot of work to do for my final year of classes. All of this just means going back to real life. This year was the escape and change I so desperately needed a year ago. I did it, and it was one of the best decisions I've ever made. It sounds cliché, but its cliché because its a common feeling. You don't know the feeling unless you've done it. I miss Spain already and I haven't even left! JODER.